The secret to dating someone who doesn't fit in is to realize that there is no such thing as "fitting in"!
I know that the idea of a BBW dating alliance has been around for generations. They are seared into our hearts and reinforced by countless TV shows and movies, but they are all lies. The only place where alliances exist is in our minds. People may or may not like you for a million reasons. None of this determines your value or status as a person, but we've been taught that if someone doesn't like us, it's because we don't deserve them. If you are a 5 '8 "white man who is interested in a woman who is only interested in a black man who is 6 and over, her disinterest in you has nothing to do with your worth. She's just looking for something that's incompatible with you. It's only when you turn it into a league that it becomes a league problem.
What about people who tell you you're not good enough?
Sadly, these people do exist. Just as you doubt your worth and prevent yourself from finding love, they put themselves on a very lonely pedestal and prevent themselves from finding love. We all have things we want or don't want in a curvy dating relationship. These things don't determine value. They're just facts. If you judge a person by these facts as worthless, it's more about you than it is about them.
So, how do I date people I didn't think were right for me?
Forget about the things that make you feel unworthy of others and focus on what you have together. It doesn't matter whether you think someone is more attractive than you. See what kind of people they want to meet. See what you have in common, and see if there are any signs that you're right for each other. That's all that matters. If you're interested in them and can honestly find evidence that they're looking for someone like you, then it's worth a try.
With this in mind, it's important not to lie to yourself. Our brains are good at rationalizing to help us get what we want. For this reason, it is important that we be honest with ourselves and know what others say they want. If you have to change yourself to fit their description, you're setting yourself up for failure.
Finally, it is important that you present yourself in the most honest and engaging way possible. If you start your profile thinking you can convince someone to give you a chance, you're going to fail. Even if you use a strong sales pitch to cajole someone into giving you a chance, if you really don't click, you'll never make it. Your profile is not an advertisement for a used car; Don't use it as a sales tool. No one wants to be sold out. They want to know who you are and what you're looking for. If this is too much for you to put into words, let us help you.
In the end, we all want to find a great person to share our lives with, but we all believe that it is just out of reach, in a better league than we are adapted to. It's an interesting concept, but it's not true. As long as you and your BBW hookup partner are a good match, you're showing the best profile and photo you can, and you're confident in your worth, you have a good chance of finding true love.